Begin Again

at each day’s sunrise

little red boy comes to dine

begin again now

 

The pc sits in front of a window, covered by miniblinds with one crooked piece, right at eye level.  Three feet away, through the window lies another world off the patio, in the brush.  It is a natural space, maintained by landscapers-though they seem indifferent to the human trash that blows around; the water bottles, plastic trim from windows, broken glass, bags.  The couple hundred feet of native trees and cacti are watered by drip irrigation, occasionally visible under the layer of dirt and noted by the wet puddles twice a day.  The birds don’t mind the communal bathing and sipping.

I had been hoping for more variety in the birds that would come around since we moved here a year ago.  I was leaving out kitchen scraps and the seeds of vegetables and fruits, but mostly attracting bunnies and big birds that I know,now, are Thrashers.  They are bullish and brave.  And voracious.  Sometimes, they tap on the sliding patio door, complaining of late offerings.  Last week, I decided to buy the $5.00 bag of wild bird seed at the grocery store, thinking those birds would be happy and that I might get lucky and see some smaller birds. There’s some activity and peeping from a low mesquite tree on the east side of the building. I would hear the rustling and chatter on my walks around the parking lot waiting for the school bus to arrive.  One day this week, I heard the same chatter out the window and set the blinds to spy, without being seen by the new visitors.

It’s hard not to give them personalities and names.  It’s like my private, little Downton Abbey.  Showtime will shift as the sun comes up earlier. I’ll have to make an effort to take time to appreciate this little theater when it is going on.  I am sure there is a lesson to be learned (for me) about the beginnings of a day.  I’m in my 50s now, you wouldn’t think I need to learn this, but it seems I do.  I also think there is something to be had about the opportunity to take advantage of these little vignettes in life, to start something new, add a little something, just to ensure I keep going.

This is my year of new beginnings, of adding little things, of flexibility and compromise…..in little ways, not big promises and no dashed expectations.

 

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About kat9090

Hafu (Half Japanese), Late Discovery Adoptee, Sister, Mom, Daughter, Wife, I cook, look back, look forward, lean left, drive a lot, write a lot, wish a lot, I will be square with you if you are square with me. Find me on Instagram @shojikat and Twitter @biteme9090
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